Angels Vs. Demons

So I've been thinking a lot lately on the whole angel on one shoulder, demon on the other concept.... If we take the time to analyze what decisions are "good" and what decisions are "bad" wouldn't we always end up choosing the better way? To me, this is never how it seems to work out. I have been blessed to have been taught to always looks at both sides of an argument, look at both sides of a story, and to look at both outcomes depending on the decision I have made, before making a choice. This trait is something I wish most people had but I also see the fault in having such open-mindedness. There come times when you're faced with a dilemma on what to choose. I always find myself asking, "OK, if I do this, this could happen and this could happen.. etc." I always end up having one option, the OBVIOUS option and then the OTHER option. Some may think of this as the "angel and demon" but I prefer the OBVIOUS and the OTHER. Why is it so tempting to choose the OTHER option?? I've sat and tried to think of why and this is what I've come up with..... The OTHER option is a dark path. You really don't know how the tables could turn or what's ahead so your curiosity gets your brain thinking of all the possible outcomes. Most of the time you see the negative before any of the positive but still, your brain wants you to go explore the unknown... Meanwhile, your trusty heart is always there pointing out the OBVIOUS choice, the lightened path if you will. You know where that path is going to take you. You're safe on the lightened path with little to no risks... But as you're walking down the OBVIOUS path you always catch yourself wondering about the OTHER. I have always believed that we learn more from our mistakes than we do our success. I also believe that "God" (no religion smack talking please) is a humorous soul. Who would want to watch a movie with nothing ever going on? How boring for "God" to sit there and watch all of us make the right decisions and live perfect little lives... "God" knew from the beginning that wasn't a good idea... So I think "God" made it to where we do learn more from our mistakes than our success so that our brains would evolve to always be tempted by these decisions. Choosing the OTHER option doesn't always have bad consequences. There might be times when your lost or don't know what's coming next but it doesn't always end badly. Of course people do call it the angel and devil for a reason. We are tempted to pick the "devil" not because we're too dumb to know there's a difference but because our brains don't like not knowing. We have evolved as a culture to always want to know more. To thrive on education and knowledge. The right answer isn't always at the end of the OBVIOUS path. Sometimes you have to pick the wrong choices to know how not to mess up next time. This is not to say that doing the wrong things is always going to turn out right for you... There are always consequences of your actions and you have to deal with those as they come. People piss me off who always make the wrong choices... You would think with all that experience they would know by now.. Different subject, different day... But all I'm saying is sometimes you can't always be afraid to know your not taking the right or safe path. I believe if you have good intentions, own up to your own faults, and learn from whatever choices you make; eventually good things will result. If your heart always stays in a good place you will never go wrong.... THE END :) Please no religion comments~ Your God is Your God and Mine is Mine :) Peace & Love people, Peace & Love!

Staying In Control

Staying in control of everything that happens in your life is impossible. It doesn't take a politician, a doctor, or anyone else to tell us this to know that it's the truth. So why do we try and control every situation?? We do it without even realizing it.. Ever passed a car in fury because they are not driving up to your expectations?? Ever changed your outfit after everyone says it looks good on you?? These are control issues... We try to control who we fall in love with and who we fall out of love with; when the truth is... it's all out of our control. No matter how much we tell ourselves to get over that one person, that they aren't worth it, we still find ourselves listening to that one song that reminds us of them. We still think of them as the one person that we need to drunk dial/text. We still think of this one person when certain movies or shows comes on... No matter what we tell ourselves we can't control how we feel. We also can't control the actions of others... As much as we try and try again, we always fail miserably at trying to control others. The actions, the words, the thoughts of others. We get mad at what someone says, we get depressed at the actions of some, and without even knowing it, we try and put thoughts into peoples minds. Commercials are a good example. I can't tell you how many times I have sat and watched Olive Garden commercials and then right after the commercial has ended, I'm hungry and oddly enough, craving Olive Garden. Movies are another example of how we try and control our lives. Ever since movies started there has been that movie.. The movie where the damsel in distress is saved by her prince charming on a white horse, right in time before the evil monster tries to kill the princess. Our minds then program themselves that that princess is us. That if we wait long enough, prince charming will arrive. In reality, if your waiting on your prince, you better hope Monday Night Football isn't on because if so, you will not be priority. Everything around us tries to control our lives without us even realizing it. So where do we draw the line?? When do we decide that we want control of ourselves?? In my opinion there is little we can control. Things happen! The secret to staying in control is to simply be out of control. Cross the lines and don't think just because it happened to them, it will happen to me. You have to learn to roll with the punches.. Try and be as optimistic and possible. Remember that prince charming might have came, but he came with a horse; which is a lot of up keep. Try and remember that the majority of your life, you will not be in control. Let the good shine through and remind us that although a lot of things are out of our control, we can control one thing... And that's how we approach situations. You can look at a situation and immediately think the worst, or you can take a step back; remind yourself that its out of your control, and hope for the best. Remember there is only one YOU in this world and no one should control YOU.

This quote is such a great ending to this blog... James Arthur Ray-"Control is never achieved when sought after directly. It is the surprising outcome of letting go"

*In Love With The Past*

Why do we not have a time machine? I always thought it would be nice to gaze into your future and see what it holds.. See who you are going to marry, if you get that job, how cute your kids will be... But I think I would get the most use from a time machine by traveling back to my past. Re-living my first kiss, my first day of school, or my first time getting drunk( I'm sure I was a mess). I often find myself really missing things from my past. The friends you once had but don't anymore. The love you once had but don't anymore. I always miss the days of my girls. The bond all 6-7 of us had. We always had things to do and people to see. All the pictures we used to take and all the laughs we had. The older we get the more busy we are with our own lives and times of the Gracious Girls are more and more in the dark. Of course we find time to see each other and check in on each other but it will never be the same as it once was. I would love to re-live the times us girls partied all nights of the week and had "the hills" nights. Another thing I miss from my past are the people I have lost... Let's start waaayyy back with my best friends dad. He was one of the most AMAZING people I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. I can recall times he would scare the shit out of us with ghost stories or when he had the keys to the local middle school and we got to go swimming when no one was there. Derek Henry is another person I wish I could travel back and have fun with. One of my best friends by far. We would always go to his house and eat pudding and Pepsi, making fun on anyone who was on TV. We would ride around with friends and sing retarded songs like "Bartender" by rehab. Why is the past so far away??? If I could go back into the past I would go to where all anyone worried about was what they were wearing to the middle school dance. The past is as far away as yesterday.... I wish I could go back to my senior year and spend time with all the friends you thought you had. I would spend my time cuddling and laughing with that one guy who never failed to break my heart. If I could go back into my past knowing that our relationship wasn't going to work either way I would have spent that time cherishing it a little more. I would have spent that extra 5 minutes telling him what he really meant to me or given that extra goodnight kiss to keep him wanting more.. If you look into your past are you happy its over or sad that you can't go back? There are so many things in your past that you would change if you had the chance but then we wouldn't be the people we are today. Everything in our past repeats itself and reminds us that each day is something to cherish because you will look back and wish you didn't wish your life away. Everyone wants to be older or wants to rush the week away to something better. And then looking back you realize you never appreciated anything in the moment. The past is nothing more than your shadow haunting you and reminding you that what once was is now a memory you will long for later. Remember to love like you never been hurt, laugh when no one else is, and to dance in the rain. The past is something to learn and grow from. But you always have to remember the past is the past for a reason.. And the people from your past that aren't in your future aren't there for a reason. Your past is something no one can take away from you. But the most important thing about your past is to remember it's the past and nothing stays the same for long. So cherish everyday and remember it will be your past tomorrow. You past should be something you want to go back on and re-live. buuutttt spending too much time in your past will only make you miss out on an AMAZING future, which in time... will be your past :)

*Pick Your Poison*

Everyone has their "poison" that seems to wash away all their problems... I have many... Depending on the day and mood it varies from an ice cold Bud Light to some cheap tequila... What is it about alcohol that makes your worries and fears disappear?? Alcohol can turn a boring day into an interesting night. For my past birthday a couple of friends and I went to Panama City for Spring Break(which happened to fall on my birthday) and alcohol was our main man.. We drank sun up to sun down. One of those nights we went out to some club and the band was playing all of the songs a drunk wants to hear.. Being in my drunken stooper, I decided to get up on stage and dance with the band... This was followed by me(back towards the audience) trying to head-bang and GRACEFULLY falling backwards into the crowd, their mic in my hand... Besides the horrible bruises and sore ass the next day, it was a blast! Anyone that knows me, knows I would not be the skank girl dancing on stage on a normal night... But the liquor was flowing and I had ambitions of being a groupy... That is one week I will never remember but never forget.. Alcohol was our greatest asset. Ever heard the phrase "tequila loves me even when you don't?" well if you haven't; Use it and love it. Everyone wants to go out and get hammered after a heavy breakup or a horrible fight... why is that?? I believe I live this answer... The answer is because alcohol is always there. It's convenient, it's cheap, it doesn't have an opinion, and the more you drink the more you love the taste. You could be as sad as ever and after a few drinks you could care less that your boyfriend is mad or broke up with you.. You are more worried about this ugly guy following you around at the bar who wants to buy you drinks all night. Alcohol does have it's bad points and some people you learn to hate when they are all liquored up.. Ever had that stupid guy/girl who is drunker than a skunk, telling you their life story (which you could care less about) and then trying to get you to come home with them... These are what I like to call "DRUNK CREEPERS".. Everyone knows one.. and personally I would like to thank all these people because if they weren't around who would you talk about the next day or get to buy you white castle at the end of the night?? My point in writing this was simple... I love alcohol.. I am not an alcoholic but it is one of the best man made things we have... After a glass of wine, a bottle of beer, or a bottle of tequila; your lips starts to go numb, your smile widens and all yours cares in the world are drown into that bottle until reality hits you in the ass the next day... Now of course alcohol has its downfalls.. Its killed many people( people who shouldn't be drinking anyways), it causes families to break up( that should have been anyways) and it does sometimes, cause some nasty hangovers.. But who doesn't love it??? You get drunk, worry about yourself and your good time and that's that... One quote that I just love even though it really doesn't pertain to any of the above... "A drunk mans words are a sober mans thoughts"... Remember this next time you get that drunk dial! :)

To wish to be someone else is a waste of who you are

Everyone has their sad story and things they would love to change about themselves... When will this ever stop? Everyday we see someone driving down the road in a flashy new car and we wish we were the one driving; everyday we see the cute couple that makes us want to vomit and we wish we were "that guy" or "that girl"... Again, when will this ever stop?? The answer is never! Someone is always going to have what you don't. I have found the key to not letting yourself wish you were someone else is to make up stories in your head about these people... For instance, the cute couple that seems to follow you around right as you're feeling like there will never be anyone out there for you; I bet that cute couple just got done fighting about who cheated on who and now they are making up... This always seems to help me :) We were given this life for a reason. All the hardships one has to endure only builds character! Think of anything bad that has ever happened to you... Most likely something good has came of it! I could sit for days and think of things to improve in my life and in myself.. but I find most days it is a waste of time.. You are who you are for a reason. I have lost loved ones too early, had my heart torn out and spit on, been to hell and back. But the loved ones I lost taught be that today could be your day. You never know when your last day is so we need to live in the moment and forget about the rest. That "guy" who broke my heart proved to me that he wasn't worth my time. That I deserve someone who loves me for me.. We all wish we were different people at times but be thankful for who you are! No one has "Your Story"!