*In Love With The Past*

Why do we not have a time machine? I always thought it would be nice to gaze into your future and see what it holds.. See who you are going to marry, if you get that job, how cute your kids will be... But I think I would get the most use from a time machine by traveling back to my past. Re-living my first kiss, my first day of school, or my first time getting drunk( I'm sure I was a mess). I often find myself really missing things from my past. The friends you once had but don't anymore. The love you once had but don't anymore. I always miss the days of my girls. The bond all 6-7 of us had. We always had things to do and people to see. All the pictures we used to take and all the laughs we had. The older we get the more busy we are with our own lives and times of the Gracious Girls are more and more in the dark. Of course we find time to see each other and check in on each other but it will never be the same as it once was. I would love to re-live the times us girls partied all nights of the week and had "the hills" nights. Another thing I miss from my past are the people I have lost... Let's start waaayyy back with my best friends dad. He was one of the most AMAZING people I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. I can recall times he would scare the shit out of us with ghost stories or when he had the keys to the local middle school and we got to go swimming when no one was there. Derek Henry is another person I wish I could travel back and have fun with. One of my best friends by far. We would always go to his house and eat pudding and Pepsi, making fun on anyone who was on TV. We would ride around with friends and sing retarded songs like "Bartender" by rehab. Why is the past so far away??? If I could go back into the past I would go to where all anyone worried about was what they were wearing to the middle school dance. The past is as far away as yesterday.... I wish I could go back to my senior year and spend time with all the friends you thought you had. I would spend my time cuddling and laughing with that one guy who never failed to break my heart. If I could go back into my past knowing that our relationship wasn't going to work either way I would have spent that time cherishing it a little more. I would have spent that extra 5 minutes telling him what he really meant to me or given that extra goodnight kiss to keep him wanting more.. If you look into your past are you happy its over or sad that you can't go back? There are so many things in your past that you would change if you had the chance but then we wouldn't be the people we are today. Everything in our past repeats itself and reminds us that each day is something to cherish because you will look back and wish you didn't wish your life away. Everyone wants to be older or wants to rush the week away to something better. And then looking back you realize you never appreciated anything in the moment. The past is nothing more than your shadow haunting you and reminding you that what once was is now a memory you will long for later. Remember to love like you never been hurt, laugh when no one else is, and to dance in the rain. The past is something to learn and grow from. But you always have to remember the past is the past for a reason.. And the people from your past that aren't in your future aren't there for a reason. Your past is something no one can take away from you. But the most important thing about your past is to remember it's the past and nothing stays the same for long. So cherish everyday and remember it will be your past tomorrow. You past should be something you want to go back on and re-live. buuutttt spending too much time in your past will only make you miss out on an AMAZING future, which in time... will be your past :)